Graduating Gives Guys a Degree in Chivalry?

Will all the single ladies please....line up?

OK, contrary to popular belief from my last posts, post-grad college life is pretty amazing sometimes.  That’s why I’m going to dedicate this post to something positive. Because yes, also contrary to popular belief, post-grad life is not a purgatory (I have a tendency to be a little melodramatic from time to time).

Back during my college days (that seem so long ago) going on dates seemed like a non-existent activity.  Go ahead and rat on me if you’ve been on ten dates already and you haven’t even been through an entire semester.  If that’s the case, I now understand why I don’t know you.

Anywho, I rarely went on any dates.  I met a lot of guys, but for some reason (probably somewhere along the lines of everyone leading a lifestyle two leaps away from a homeless person) dates were a seldom activity.  Therefore, while meeting guys was not difficult in college, dating them was.

Nowadays as a post-grad, meeting guys is a little more difficult to do outside of a strenuous work schedule.  However,  actual dating becomes a little more natural.  As opposed to college when I was surrounded by lax tees and Natty-Ice-grasping-frat-dudes 24/7 who couldn’t afford to buy me a McGriddle, the guys out here are more like, well, men.

During college, I was convinced chivalry did not exist anymore.  I mean, please; dudes wouldn’t even pump beer into my Solo cup for me.  Dudes wouldn’t hold the door for me at Chipotle.  Dudes wouldn’t sacrifice a treadmill during a busy afternoon in the workout room for me.  Dudes wouldn’t offer up the last burrito in the line at the caf for me.  I felt like a dude wouldn’t even go the extra mile to dedicate a fart to me (not that I’d want anything to do with that).

I figured their lack o’ chivalry had something to do with the fact that they were all twenty going on eight-years-old and they barely had enough money to support their Red Dog addiction.  So, I let it pass and drank a lot of booze, smooched a lot of cuties, and played the field the best I knew how – like a single girl without apologies.

But I have news for you!  Good news!  By no means have I taken the place of the upcoming Bachelorette, but let me tell you this: I have discovered a miracle within a fugly dating world that existed during my life as a careless college connoisseur.

And here it is:

That chivalry we were all digging for as college students? It’s there. I’ve found it as a post-grad and it’s alive and well.  I’m not sure if I should blame myself for not discovering that chivalry existed until now, or if I should blame all the men out there for lacking the know-how and desire to step up, but either way, I’m happy someone has taken the plate.

Since graduation, I’ve been dating more than normal and really enjoying myself.  This “dating lifestyle” I’d been dreading as an undergrad has been a pleasant surprise.  I’ve always feared the dating world because I’ve always imagined awkward conversations about the wind, nightmare dates with haywire conversations about previous girlfriends, or being unable to fit the lettuce piece into my mouth without unhinging my jaw in front of him…

But that hasn’t been the case, at all.

I’ve been treated to a few great dinners, doors have been opened for me, follow-up dates have been suggested, sweet gifts have been received.  Now, I don’t want to make this sound like I am the sh*t because I’ve been on a few not-so-great dates too, but I’ve had just enough sweet date moments to flip my negative outlook into a positive one.

And while I have had some issues with spontaneous sobfests, my most recent dating experiences have not ended in tears. They ended in a full stomach, a full wallet, and a fulfilled, happy mind.  My date treated me wonderfully, bought the entire dinner, asked questions, and walked me to my door.  It was old-fashioned, fantastic and just what I always wanted in a date.

Let it be known: somewhere out there as a post-grad, chivalry does exist!  Compared to a whirlwind life in college, where dating is muffled, chivalry is questionable and second dates are usually spent rolling around on a futon, post-grad life will give you hope.  Post-grad life will prove to you that men want to be chivalrous and they pride themselves on it.  Post-grad life will show us that boys really do want to find their manhood. Not that they never did during college — but they would probably rather try Four Loko and forget about the chick they made out with.  Although please keep note: I have not turned thirty.  I’ve turned twenty-three.  Guys are still out there who like to bump and grind against your leg and douche out with Mikes Hard Lemonade after a trip to LoserTown.

But on another positive note, to all of those struggling post-grad guys out there: props to you (if you’re doing the dating right with the some classic chivalry).  Chicks are noticing and it’s paying off.

This post was derived from my author archives at College Candy.

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University of Saint Thomas graduate. Minnesota-bred and happy to talk about the weather any time you’d like! Strongly believes any situation can be bettered by a slice of generously buttered toast or Phil Dunphy. Would get arrested to touch Justin Timberlake’s face. Always trying to be a better person by not wishing horrible karma on people driving slow in the fast lane. Hear more: @twitter @instagram


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